Seeking adventure? You've come to the right place, pal! Join the beans as they cruise the Nile, climb trees, and play Indiana Jones!

Hiya, machete-packing travelers and khaki-loving tourists, and welcome to the land of snakes, spiders, and salty snacks - Adventureland! Today the beans have put on their pith helmet, grabbed a canteen filled with Dole pineapple whip, and have trekked into the unknown world of Disneyland's most tropical land. While visiting Adventureland, the beans were thankful for three things: One, there's weren't any deadly mosquitos to worry about. Two, the headhunters were apparently off that day. And three, you don't have to walk very far to find a churro cart. Life is good!

The concept of Adventureland was based upon Uncle Walt's "True-Life Adventure" series in the early 1950s, where he showed wild and wooly nature shows, featuring seals, lions, birds, and other exotic critters -- well, exotic for the time. Keep in mind that 50+ years ago there was no such thing as live satellite feeds or 500 channel hi-def broadcasts, so a lot of the world was still a mystery to many. One of the major attractions of Disneyland's opening day in 1955 was this one right here, the world famous Jungle Cruise. It was featured heavily on Uncle Walt's Disneyland TV series before opening, and by opening day it was THE ride that everyone wanted to take. As for our brave beans, they couldn't wait to hop on the Jungle Cruise for themselves, although they were sorely disappointed to discover that the "cruise" aspect was highly exaggerated. What, no shuffleboard???

Anyway, when you board your official Jungle Cruise boat, you, your skipper, and about 40 other vacationers (who are also enjoying the opportunity to actually sit down for a few minutes) are taken on a trek upriver, where you'll meet bathing elephants, snapping crocodiles, hungry, hungry hippos, and yes - Trader Sam, who for 50 years has ran a 2-for-1 sale. If you don't know what he's offering to sell you, then get yourself down to Anaheim and find out for yourself, okay? Regardless, you'll be glad to know that the frijoles survived their float down the Nile/Amazon/Disney Ride Water River, and never once did they turn green.

Having survived that ordeal, the beans decided that they'd better keep their can on solid ground...well, sort of. Instead of dealing with piranhas and gators in the river, they instead climbed some trees, where the only likely real predator would be an angry pigeon who didn't get his daily ration of spilled popcorn. This is Tarzan's Treehouse, which used to belong to the Swiss Family Robinson until they were unceremoniously evicted by the King of Apes and his posse of baboons. So let that be a lesson to all of you kids out there - NEVER play three card monte with a guy who wears a loincloth and swings from vines. It'll only lead to heartbreak...

Since the door was open (and the trailer wasn't rockin'), the beans didn't bother ringing the bell - they instead barged their way into Tarzan and Jane's happy little domicile, where they found the blissed-out couple up to their antics: Jane, brushing her long flowing mane, trying to remember that she's got to be the hottest chick all of pseudo-Africa, and the T. Man himself, who apparently has enjoyed so much sugar that he cannot keep from climbing all over the furniture. See? This is the reason that even animated characters can't have nice things, either. The beans were going to invite themselves to stay for dinner, but it quickly became obvious that neither Narcissistic Jane or Wall Bouncing Tarzan were likely to cook, so instead they called for pizza delivery. Alas, the delivery time was pegged at 3 months - who knew it took so long to get a large deep dish pepperoni and mushroom out here in the wild?

Finally, the beans had to stop by to check out the Temple of the Forbidden Eye, which is home to none other than Dr. Henry "Indiana" Jones. It seems that if you're brave enough to take on the cursed god Mara, you too can be rewarded with all sorts of goodies, provided you don't look into his/her/its eye. Of course, all sorts of awful, horrendous things happen to those who don't follow the "no lookie" rule, but it's okay - if you were to somehow keep your peepers closed, it wouldn't be much of an adventure, now would it? Anyway, here the beans check out a couple of cobras that guard the front of the temple, although from the looks of it they may have met up with Medusa instead of Indy. Still, they were intimidating enough, especially when the beans found out that those fangs can also be used as a can opener. Oooh, scary. So there you be - an Adventurous time in Adventureland. What more could you ask for? As for the beans, they'll off to practice their whip cracking and to pick up one of those cool Indiana Jones hats. Oh, and if they stumble across a large emerald or ruby hidden inside a cursed statue, they'll snag one of those, too. Hey, you only live once, right?