What do you get when you combine Disney with California and toss in a dash of Adventure? Why, a theme park! Here's part I...

Hey there, Go West-ers, and welcome to Sunny California! Or to be exact, welcome to Disney's version of California -- millions of square miles of real estate summed up in one tidy little theme park. Disney's California Adventure opened in February 2001 to less than thrilling reviews, but over time they've added a few more attractions and spruced the park up to the point where it's (mostly) respectable.) So here we are at the esplanade outside of DCA, where giant letters remind you of where you are. It's a darn good thing, too, because our easily confused frijoles thought for a second they might be in Jersey...

Anyway, DCA is located about 100 yards away from the main entrance to Disneyland, and was built on 55 acres of land that was formally D'Land's parking lot. The beans are glad that the parking lot is gone - it'd make dashing from ride to ride a lot more difficult, and "Frogger" isn't exactly an E-ticket attraction. But on the bright side, here's the beans at Sunshine Plaza, where a giant sun is there to remind you of the importance of SPF 30 or higher.

Next up the beans make their way to the back of the park, where Paradise Pier is located. Paradise Pier was designed to be reminiscent of an old fashioned Atlantic boardwalk, complete with rides, beach food, midway games, and seagulls everywhere begging for your french fries. Hopefully they're not into canned beans... The beans really like the layout of the Disneyfied version of Paradise Pier - there are no beggars, no weirdos juggling fire for your spare change, and no sand in your taffy. Plus, vegetables are not only welcome, they're practically adored. So bring your beans and break out the applause!

The starring attraction in Paradise Pier is this one -- California Screamin'. California Screamin' is the only Disney roller coaster in California with an upside down loop, so make sure that you follow those "buckle your seatbelt" rules very carefully. And although it looks like a classic beachfront woodie, California Screamin' is actually a metal coaster, which the beans really appreciate. Having their little frijole fillings shaken out on a wooden coaster isn't exactly their idea of "fun".

Another attraction that's popular with the kiddies is this one - the Orange Stinger, which contains a classic swing ride hidden behind this giant orange peel. The beans are curious why they used an orange as the logo, since oranges these day are more closely associated with Florida and not California, but they suppose it'd be silly to have an "Avocado Stinger" instead. Despite their initial confusion, the beans liked swinging around on the Stinger, and are glad that none of those infamous California Killer Bees were included in the stings.

The beans also stopped to check out the Sun Wheel, which is a ferris wheel type ride, only featuring cars that move. Inspired by Coney Island's 1927 Wonder Wheel (again -- New York, not California!), the Sun Wheel has 16 orange and purple gondolas that slide on interior rails so that they move in and out with the gravitational force during the wheel's rotational movement. Doesn't that sound like fun and/or pure terror? For those of you (like our cowardly frijoles) who'd rather not think of plunging to Earth on a ride, you can opt out of the moving cars and take a peaceful, non-sliding ride on one of the outside gondolas instead. It's not as thrilling, but like the frijoles, you probably won't need to change your skivvies afterwards.

And even though we're about to make our way out of this segment, we thought you should be reminded that you too deserve to be properly greeted. Better late than never, no? Since our beans are originally from California, too, they felt it was their place to serve as an unofficial ambassador of goodwill for their home state. They'd present you with a key to the city, but alas -- individual keys are pricey, and they didn't want to contribute to the metal shortage. So instead they'll just stand here and say "Yeah, boooooy" to everyone who passes. So there you have it - the first half of our amazing DCA trip. So take a break, grab some popcorn or a frozen banana, and meet us momentarily at part II. Why, it's the most fun you'll have since part I, and we promise not to try to sell you any t-shirts or postcards. (Okay, maybe just a couple of key chains and a small snow globe.)