All roads lead to Main Street, USA, you know. That, and it's the only way in or out, so eventually you'll be here...twice.

Hiya, Mouseketeers, and welcome once again to the Happiest Place on Earth! The beans have been in away in a self-imposed sabbatical for a while, but for a trip to Disneyland, they'll gladly return to the action. So let's get this park march started here on Main Street USA, and the Main Street railroad station. It's here that you can board one of five trains for a 22-minute trip around the park. There's also stops in Frontierland, Mickey's Toontown, and Tomorrowland, but if you're going to be authentic, you probably need to board here. Otherwise, it's like walking into a movie 30 minutes late, then having to sit there and wait for the next showing to see what you've missed. It's semblance, people! Anyway, the beans did the right thing and hopped the train here on Main Street. And as tempting as it may of been, they didn't rob the train, ala Butch Cassidy. I mean, is a night in the hoosegow worth it for 175 pairs of hot mouse ears?

The beans then turned their attention towards Main Street's city hall, as every good old fashioned bureaucracy needs to have a central office, right? Actually, Disneyland's city hall isn't filled with stuffy politicians and paper pushers - nope, this is where you'll find the nice people of the Guest Relations department, who patiently put up with all sorts of comments, complaints, and suggestions from Guests. The Guest Relations people that I know have the patience of saints, and the beans would only say good things about their efforts to keep everyone happy. The beans did stop by the city hall to say hello, hoping that they'd give them the key to the city (or the front gate, if you please). Sadly, the only thing they gave them was a park brochure. Maybe next time.

Next door to the city hall you'll find Disneyland's fire department, where if you'll look carefully you may spot one of their dalmatians. (Why Cruella DeVil isn't hanging out here, I'll never know). But what's really cool about this firehouse is the second floor - this is where Uncle Walt's personal (and very private) apartment is located. He used to spend the night in the park in his apartment, where he could keep an eye on everything from his own perch. After Walt passed away in 1966, Disney worked to preserve the apartment just as he and his wife Lillian kept it - a Tom & Jerry drink set, an old phonograph that uses wax canisters to play, and red velvet furniture. The public isn't allowed in the apartment - very few people are - but I've been fortunate enough to see it twice. For us Disney fans, it's better than wandering the White House and Graceland combined. The beans weren't fortunate enough to get into Uncle Walt's apartment, but they did stop to say hi to the firemen. They've been known to be "burned" once or twice, so it's good to have friends in the fire department.

Anxious to see a movie (or six), the beans dropped by the Main Street Cinema, where a half dozen classic Mickey Mouse silent films play at once. It's a good place to escape the summer heat for a while, and the best part? No Hillary Duff. The beans still want to star in a movie - other than their cameo appearance in "Blazing Saddles", that is...

The beans also popped by the Crystal Arcade, which isn't your typical arcade - this one is filled with souvenirs instead of Pac Man machines. The beans were hoping to pick up a new Donald Duck t-shirt in their size, but all they could find was some doll clothes. I mean, what self-respecting can of frijoles would be caught dead in a Barbie dress? I mean, they may be canned, but they still have their pride.

But since the beans wanted to play some games, they did pop into the Penny Arcade, where they still have a few of the old classic games that your grandpa remembers playing over a 5 cent Coke way back when. (Just ask him - he'll tell you for hours about it!) They've also got squished penny machines in here, where you can put 51 cents into a machine, and it'll flatten your penny and emboss it with a new Disney-fied image. As far as souvenirs go, they're fairly affordable, even if you'll never be able to use it for change at 7-Eleven again. The beans bought 20 squished pennies, and were thankful that there wasn't a squished frijoles presses available. 'Cause that would just be nasty.

And because nothing helps a day at Disneyland more than being jacked up on candy and Coca-Cola, the beans dropped in both the Candy Palace and the Refreshment Corner, where sugary sweet snacks are only a smile (and a wad of cash) away. The beans just love the smell of these two shoppes, and the fact that there's fudge, popcorn, taffy, and ice cream as far as the eye can see, it's like a little slice of Heaven right on Earth. Need I mention that the beans really enjoyed this stop on their tour? They'd tell you themselves, once they quit bouncing off the walls...

So there you have it - a great recreation of the America that never was, brought to you by the nice people at Disney. Main Street is a great introduction to the fun that is ahead, and an even better way to wrap up the day, when its all lit up at dark. Plus, there's no traffic, no garbage in the streets, and no tagging on the walls. See what it's like? The beans invite you to join them as they're walking down the middle of Main Street U.S.A. Just be sure to bring some extra scratch for the candy shoppe, okay?