Arguing insurance with the idiot at the Thrifty Car Rental window
Needless cell phone calls
Basil ice cream
Having to go home

• Watch your step.

• Leave your worries at home. Especially if they are between the ages of 2 and 17... (Just kidding, Katie.) You'll have plenty of time to fret about cleaning the grout in the bathroom tile when you get back.

• Give yourself a "Plan B", in case things don't work out the way you'd hoped. It might rain, the ship might be delayed, you might miss a tour. Give yourself a backup plan, just in case you need to switch at the last minute.

• Go for it - have fun! If the waitresses ask you to get up and dance, then by all means do so. If you have a chance to answer trivia questions or sing in the talent show or wear your bathrobe to a deck party, then go for it! What do you care about potentially embarrassing yourself in front of people you'll never see again?

• Try something new. Whether it's escargot in the dining room or a meal served in the Belize rainforest, don't be afraid to try something you haven't before. Who knows - you might like it. (Unless it's basil ice cream, that is.)

• Talk to the locals. We learned a lot from spending extra time talking with Bol on the rainforest hike, and I'm glad that we did. Sure, there's the occasional language difficulty, but remember that a smile is universal.

• Don't haul too much junk with you on excursions. Your sore arms will make sure you regret it later on. Wear your swimsuit, bring something to throw over it if you must, and grab a towel. That's about it.

• See at least one sunrise. You won't regret it.

• Need I mention the positive attributes of sunscreen? I didn't think so.

• Enjoy your time with your spouse, significant other, kids, family, etc... I will forever remember the wonderful times that Mary and I had on this trip together, and with a little luck and some more of those amazing 21st century medical breakthroughs it'll be something we'll still be reminiscing about 50 years from now. I had an amazing time hanging out with my wife and best friend on the high seas, and hope to do it again real soon.

Notes of Gratitude

First off, my deepest thanks to the staff and crew of the MS Carnival Miracle. Thanks for giving us the vacation of a lifetime.

Special double bonus points go to the dining room team - Tatiana and Jana, assistant maitre'd Arta, beverage hostess Helena, and everyone who worked hard to put on some really great meals. Also, thanks to Zsa Zsa and the staff at Nick & Noras for a deluxe dining experience the likes we won't see again for a long, long time.

A special note of gratitude to Bryan, the casino manager, for not letting that quarter sucker eat all of our spare change.

My appreciation also must go to CD Steve, Karl with a K, Candace, Ali, and the Miracle dancers and band for keeping us entertained for a solid week. People wonder if they'll be bored on a cruise; I can honestly promise you that there is no way you'll be, thanks to the efforts of these hard working people.

And yes -- thank you, Super Shopper Lacey. Even though we never did follow your Super Shopping advice, it was nice to meet you nonetheless.

Also, I have to say thanks to the Carnival photographers, who I have teased unmercifully over the last several dozen pages, but still deserve some credit for taking the occasional photo we liked. (And believe me; that's not an easy thing to do.)

Our appreciation must go out again to Larry and Kim for being so much fun to dine with. Congratulations again on your marriage, and both Mary and I wish you all the love and happiness in the world.

On top of all these giddy stacks of appreciation, my deepest eternal thanks have to go to Mrs. Mary Burk, my travel partner and wife. She put up with my nonstop babbling about cruising for 10 solid months, and came along for the ride, letting me make most of the choices. I couldn't ask for a better week, and if I'm ever stuck in a "Groundhog's Day" moment, I hope it's from one of these days when we were together on the Miracle.

Finally, here's to you - the poor soul who has spent countless hours reading this incredibly long report. I hope you've enjoyed it as much as I have putting it together. And perhaps one day we can all sail together - just let me know, and the first raspberry daiquiri is on me.

So. Where are we off to next?

Well, that's a mystery that we'll just have to discover when the time arrives. Until then...

Take care,

Kevin Burk
February 20, 2005